as lady barbara would say, "next week at this time it will ALL be over!" she said that about holidays, visits, surgeries, weddings, graduations, and any other event that is circled in red on the calendar. events that we plan for, look forward to, and dream about; as well as events we worry about, dread, lose sleep over. i here her voice in this anxious mind of mine, that next week at this time it will all be over.
i am touched by so many who are thinking good thoughts and tell me they will pray for me (note: i know some of you aren't prayers, so cut that out). but at the same time, the fiesty impossible me thinks to herself
"quit it! you don't know that it will be fine! what if i have a stroke on the table? or bleed out? or they nick the back of my throat with that electrode such that i can never breathe or swallow comfortably again?!" these are all possibilities. remote, but stated, and therefore, real.
baby brat, worry wart, negative nellie -- say what you need to say, call it like you see it, what a grumpus. this is all true, all these words describe me this day. i embrace my gloominess, at least for today.
meanwhile, please keep telling me that everything will be fine.
because next week at this time it will all be over.
1 comment:
Don't let worrying about it ruin this moment right now now.
xoxo
huggies & kissies!
Jill
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